The Adventures of Hermia and Lysander
by Miss Wallflower
Summary: Hermia and Lysander are married and they meet lots of other couples and random people. Wackiness ensues!
1. Lord, What Fools These Mortals Be!

The Adventures of Hermia and Lysander!  
  
Starring: Hermia and Lysander!  
  
And with the fairies!  
  
Disclaimer: We don't own this. Yay.  
  
Chapter One: "Lord What Fools These Mortals Be"  
  
Hermia and Lysander were walking down the hallway of their house. Hermia had on a maroon dress with a white lacey thing on the outside. He was wearing a green suit. With a dickie. Because since they got married, they got a house! Cause that's what married people do!  
  
Anyway they were walking down the hallway. The doorbell rang. Lysander answered the door. It was Helena and Demetrius! Helena was wearing a purplish bluish dress with a fake corset on the front. So she felt special, because she felt special with the fake corset. Demetrius was wearing a slimy maroon suit. That looked ripped at the knees. Just like Lysander's!  
  
They entered. Helena, Hermia, Lysander, and Demetrius talked. Then suddenly Puck appeared! She was wearing a red tutu. She used a magical Cupid-flower to cause mayhem.  
  
Soon enough, Lysander was stalking Helena, and Demetrius was stalking Hermia. Helena was sad, and Hermia was mad. Then they all yelled at Puck, because she forgot to make herself invisible, and so they could see that she was there, wearing a red tutu.  
  
Puck realized that she had forgotten to become invisible. So she said, "I am invisible," and waved her hand over her face. She was now invisible. The lovers were stalking each other. It was funny (to Puck.). It was very stalkerish. I just invented the word 'stalkerish', didn't I? Yes, I did. ANYWAY.........  
  
Puck had changed clothes. She was now wearing an ugly goldish dress. It made her bra strap show. So she had to have Hermia's mother, Kelliy, safety pin the dress strap to her bra. It was painful. But that's OK. Because, Lysander and Demetrius had their socks duct taped to their skin above the knees, so the socks would not show. Unlike the night before, where the socks fell. And everyone was sad. Especially the fairies.  
  
"My socks! I can't move my socks!" Exclaimed Lysander.  
  
Then Kelliy yelled at Puck, because when she safety-pinned the dress strap to Puck's bra, Puck had to become un-invisible. So Kelliy yelled at Puck for messing with her daughter's love life. And Hermia's mother existed, and her name was Kelliy, and we just TOTALLY made that up!  
  
So Puck reversed the spell, because Kelliy threatened to take away the safety pins, and Puck didn't. But Kelliy had to put the safety pins in, while Puck was invisible. So Puck kept getting poked. With the safety pins. But Puck reversed the spell, and Helena and Demetrius were back in love, so they left, and Hermia and Lysander went back to wandering their hallway. 


	2. Mr Sandman Stole my Blanket!

Chapter Two- "Mr. Sandman Stole My Blanket!"  
  
Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum bum Bum Bum Bum Bum. Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum bum Bum Bum Bum Bum. Mister Sandman! Bring me a dream!  
  
The sweet song of "Mr. Sandman" was playing on Linus's radio. Sally was there, and so was Charlie Brown. Sally loved Linus. They listened to "Mr. Sandman" on the radio four times in a row.  
  
Then twelve fairies charged through the window. The glass shattered. Not because of the fairies intruding though. It was because Daffodil the fairy, was trying to sing. And the other fairy was doing a funky dance, and ran into the window on accident. They took Linus's blanket.  
  
"Why are you taking my blanket?" asked Linus.  
  
"We need it to do our 'Mr. Sandman' dance!" exclaimed Sparkles.  
  
"Now that we aren't in a forest any more, we can't dance with bushes!" protested Peaseblossom.  
  
"So we decided to dance with blankets and pillows and slippers and bathrobes instead," announced Moth.  
  
"We need your blanket," said Soap.  
  
"See ya later," Charlie Brown said as the fairies danced out the window, Linus's blanket in hand.  
  
Hermia and Lysander were walking down the hallway. But not of their house! They used their teleporting powers to teleport to Linus's house. They were walking down the hallway of Linus's house. They entered Linus's room.  
  
"Hi you guys!" Hermia said to Linus, Sally, and Charlie. Sally was preoccupied with Linus. So she did not listen to a word of what Hermia was saying.  
  
"WHO ARE YOU, LYSANDER AND HERMIA? AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE? IN MY HALLWAY? IN MY ROOM?" Linus screamed at Lysander and Hermia. Who were looking confused at him, since he didn't yell at the fairies when they broke his window. And stole his blanket.  
  
"We used our teleporting powers to get here!" announced Lysander. He bowed grandly. "I am Lysander," he said, with an emphasis on the 'a', so it sounded like LySANder. Hermia curtsied. "And this is my wife, Hermia."  
  
"We are here to help you get your blanket back from the fairies," Hermia said.  
  
"And here comes my lady. If only Oberon would go!" Shouted Sally.  
  
It was just too damn bad that Oberon wasn't there. And Sally had no idea who the hell Oberon was in the first place.  
  
"So, do you want our help or not?" asked LySANder.  
  
"Sure, I want my blanket back!" Linus exclaimed.  
  
"But nobody invited me to go get Linus's blanket back!" Charlie Brown said. "I'm going to go be depressed over in the corner." Charlie Brown went over in the corner and was depressed. Linus, Sally, Hermia, and LySANder walked out the broken window, where they found the fairies dancing on Linus's lawn, his blanket in the hands of Scooter the fairy. The fairies were dancing to "Mr. Sandman."  
  
Suddenly, the song ended on the radio. The fairies stopped dancing, only to sprinkle glitter all over LySANder, Hermia, Sally, and Linus. Making them sleep. But only for like two seconds. Because Charlie woke them up. The fairies vanished, leaving Linus's blanket on the non-sleeping-just-woke- up-Linus. 


	3. The Ghost of Cedric Diggory!

Chapter Three - "The Ghost of Cedric Diggory"  
  
Harry and Cho were on a date. They were at Madam Crème Brooklyn's. Suddenly they say Lysander and Hermia. They magically appeared when Harry and Cho transfigured their toaster pastries into a lion. Lysander and Hermia used their teleporting powers to go to Madam Crème Brooklyn's. They walked down the hallway. Then they saw Harry and Cho.  
  
Harry and Cho looked astounded for no reason as Hermia and Lysander entered. They had never seen anyone wearing a maroon dress and green suit. Harry had a scar on his forehead. But he didn't like the scar. So he transfigured the scar of a lightning bolt into a scar of a happy face.  
  
"Who are you?" Cho asked Hermia and Lysander as they approached.  
  
Lysander bowed grandly. "I am Lysander," he said, with an emphasis on the 'a', so it sounded like LySANder. Hermia curtsied. "And this is my wife, Hermia."  
  
"What are you doing here at Madam Crème Brooklyn's?" asked Harry.  
  
"Alas, judging by all I have read or heard of in fact or fiction, the course of true love never did rum smooth. It may be a class difference!" LySANder replied!  
  
"Are you a witch or a wizard?" Cho asked the pair.  
  
"We have teleporting powers," Hermia announced.  
  
"Ooh, watch me do something super cool," LySANder said. He took out a wand from his green shirtwaist jacket thing and resurrected Cedric Diggory into a ghost.  
  
"Look, it's the ghost of Cedric!" Cho said happily. Harry felt unloved.  
  
"Don't feel unloved poor little boy!" Hermia said, comforting Harry. "LySANder said it himself, Alas, judging by all I have read or heard of in fact or fiction, the course of true love never did run smooth. It may be a class difference."  
  
"I'm ok." Harry stated. To Bano the misspelled fairy.  
  
"Besides, I'm not a poor little boy!" Harry exclaimed. "I am fifteen! You shall now feel the wrath of my teenage angstiness!"  
  
"I'm just a poor boy, nobody loves me!" Harry sang,  
  
"He's just a poor boy, from a poor family," Everybody sang back to Harry. 


	4. Feel the Wrath of the Negaverse!

Chapter Four - "Feel the Wrath of the Negaverse!"  
  
Sailor Moon and Tuxedo Mask were skipping down the streets of Tokyo with their daughter Sailor Mini-Moon. They were dressed in their Sailor Moon, Tuxedo Mask, and Sailor Mini-Moon outfits, because they had just fought evil. The evil they had just fought was the Negaverse. The Negaverse was evil.  
  
Hermia and Lysander were walking down the streets of Tokyo. They got to Tokyo by using their teleporting powers. (What did you expect, that they flew there on broomsticks? Cause that makes a LOT of sense.)  
  
Rini skipped ahead of her parents, singing a song about cuddly bunnies and ice cream. Suddenly, the naturally pink-haired 3'5" little girl saw two strange people, a girl in a maroon dress and a boy in a green suit with a dickie that was ripped at the knees and his socks were duct-taped to his legs, walking down the street. "MOMMY! DADDY!" Rini exclaimed, running back to her parents. "THERE ARE STRANGE PEOPLE OVER THERE!"  
  
Sailor Moon and Tuxedo Mask looked at the strange people. It was, of course, no other than Hermia and Lysander. "Who are you?" Sailor Moon asked.  
  
Lysander bowed grandly. "I am Lysander," he said, with an emphasis on the 'a', so it sounded like LySANder. Hermia curtsied. "And this is my wife, Hermia."  
  
"Well, I'm Sailor Moon!" Sailor Moon announced, striking a pose as blue and pink lace doilies magically became her background.  
  
"And I'm Sailor Mini-Moon!" Rini added, running up next to her mother and imitating her pose.  
  
"And I'm Tuxedo Mask!" Tuxedo Mask put in, throwing a rose at the ground.  
  
"We fight crimes and triumph over evil!" Sailor Moon and Sailor Mini-Moon shouted.  
  
Looking embarrassed, Tuxedo Mask put in, "Yeah, what they said."  
  
Hermia and LySANder were amused by this. Unfortunately, the amusement did not last long, because some creep from the Negaverse ran up and kidnapped Hermia.  
  
"Oh no!" Tuxedo Mask exclaimed. "The Negaverse!"  
  
"We must go save my wife Hermia from the Negaverse!" LySANder hollered.  
  
So Sailor Moon, Sailor Mini-Moon, Tuxedo Mask, and LySANder ran to the Negaverse's secret lair (which was conveniently located in a park a block away). Sailor Moon yelled at the Negaverse. Sailor Mini-Moon yelled at the Negaverse. Tuxedo Mask yelled at the Negaverse. LySANder yelled at the Negaverse.  
  
Sailor Mini-Moon blasted the Negaverse with her Pink Sugar Heart Attack. Tuxedo Mask threw roses at them. Then Sailor Moon brought out her magical moon scepter thingy and did the magical moon scepter attack-y thing that changes every freakin' season so you can never keep it straight. The Negaverse died and Hermia was returned to LySANder. 


	5. OMG, Where's My Significant Other?

Chapter Five: "OMG, Where's My Significant Other?"  
  
Jean Grey, Scott, and Wolverine were walking down a hallway at the school? Yes, they were. Because that's where they lived. Maybe? Yes, they did live there, except when they didn't. Jean Grey and Scott loved each other, because they were married. Sadly, Jean Grey and Wolverine also loved each other. It put things in a whirl, because the girl loved two people. It was just too damn bad.  
  
Hermia and Lysander were walking down the hallway of the school? Yes, they were, because they used their teleporting powers to get there? Yes, they did. So they were at the school.  
  
Hermia and Lysander had to use the restroom. But they didn't know where it was. So they found Jesus? No. They didn't find Jesus, they found Jean Grey, Scott, and Wolverine. "Where is my sanity?" asked Hermia.  
  
"I don't know," said Wolverine. "But I do know where the restroom is!"  
  
"Great, because we were just wondering that," Lysander said.  
  
"Who are you?" Jean Grey asked.  
  
Lysander bowed grandly. "I am Lysander," he said, with an emphasis on the 'a', so it sounded like LySANder. Hermia curtsied. "And this is my wife, Hermia."  
  
"Great to know," said Wolverine.  
  
"Well, I am Scott Summers, aka Cyclops, and this is Logan, aka Wolverine, and my wife Jean Grey," Scott said, indicating each person as he introduced him.  
  
"So, where is the bathroom?" LySANder asked.  
  
"Here, I will show Hermia," said Jean Grey.  
  
"And I will show Lysander," said Scott. So Scott showed LySANder where the men's restroom was, and Jean Grey showed Hermia was the ladies' restroom was. And Wolverine stood there.  
  
The restrooms were on opposite sides of the school, so when they were done in the restrooms they didn't know where each other were. Hermia couldn't find LySANder, and LySANder couldn't find Hermia, and Scott couldn't find Jean Grey, and Jean Grey... well, she could find Scott, because she was a telepath. So Jean Grey used her telepathy to locate Scott and LySANder and took Hermia to where they were, and the lovers were all together again. And Wolverine stood there. 


	6. August 12 is National Hermia and Lysande...

Chapter Six: "August 12 is National Hermia and Lysander Day!"  
  
The Easter Bunny, Santa Clause, and Cupid were arguing with each other over if they should kick the Groundhog out of Holidayland because past the fourth grade nobody cared about the Groundhog. The Groundhog was sad, because people who were in fourth grade and under were very influential in Holidayland, and he was still legitimate.  
  
Hermia and Lysander were walking down the hallway of the grand castle in Holidayland. They got to the grand castle in Holidayland using their teleporting powers. They saw the Easter Bunny, Santa Clause, and Cupid arguing with the Groundhog. The Groundhog looked depressed.  
  
"Why are you arguing?" asked Hermia.  
  
"We want to kick the Groundhog out of Holidayland because nobody cares about his holiday past the age of nine," Cupid whined.  
  
"He's not important enough to live in Holidayland," the Easter Bunny complained.  
  
"Who are you?" Santa Clause asked Hermia and Lysander.  
  
Lysander bowed grandly. "I am Lysander," he said, with an emphasis on the 'a', so it sounded like LySANder. Hermia curtsied. "And this is my wife, Hermia."  
  
"Okay then," said the Easter Bunny.  
  
"What do you think about Groundhog Day?" asked Santa Clause.  
  
"Should the Groundhog be allowed to stay in Holidayland?" Cupid prompted.  
  
"I think that he should!" Hermia said.  
  
"Yes, the Groundhog is very important and very cool," said LySANder.  
  
"Oh, you two are so smart," said the Easter Bunny.  
  
"You shall get your own holiday now!" proclaimed Cupid.  
  
"August 12 shall now officially be National Hermia and Lysander day," Santa Clause declared. 


	7. You Got Attacked by Pinky!

Chapter Seven- "You Got Attacked by Pinky!"  
  
"Come on, Ken, come on, Skipper, we're going to miss the sale!" Barbie exclaimed, dragging her hunky hunky boyfriend and her equally blonde but not quite as pretty little sister out the door of her big pink mansion. Ken groaned- he was used to being forced to go shopping with Barbie and Skipper. Skipper really didn't mind... she was just going along so she had something to do.  
  
Barbie, Ken and Skipper got in Barbie's pink convertible and drove to the mall. They listened to the "Barbie Girl" song on the radio on the way there. Skipper sang along out of tune, because she was imperfect compared to her big sister Barbie. Poor unloved Skipper...  
  
Barbie, Ken, and Skipper got out of Barbie's pink convertible and went into the pink store with their pink shopping bags wearing pink clothes. (Well, Ken was wearing blue. Cause he's a boy. But Barbie and Skipper wore pink.) They shopped for more pink clothes at the pink store.  
  
Hermia and Lysander used their teleporting powers to go to the pink store and they ran into Barbie, Ken, and Skipper. They looked outdated because Hermia was wearing her maroon, long dress and Lysander was wearing his green suit with a dickie and his socks taped to his legs. Skipper went over to examine a pink shirt and saw the outdated couple.  
  
"OH MY GOD," Skipper exclaimed. She started screaming at the top of her lungs, causing Barbie and Ken to come over.  
  
"What's the matter, Skipper?" Barbie asked.  
  
"THEY LOOK SO OUTDATED!" Skipper shrieked, pointing at Hermia and Lysander. Barbie looked at them and passed out on the pink floor, dropping her pink shopping bag. Ken caught her and revived her. Barbie stood up and began to talk to Hermia and Lysander.  
  
"Who... who... WHO ARE YOU?" Barbie asked, cowering because of their outdatedness.  
  
Lysander bowed grandly. "I am Lysander," he said, with an emphasis on the 'a', so it sounded like LySANder. Hermia curtsied. "And this is my wife, Hermia."  
  
"Well, Hermia and LySANder," said Barbie, "We have to give you two makeovers! You look much too outdated to be roaming anywhere where humans live. So we shall give you makeovers!"  
  
"OOH! MAKEOVERS!" Skipper squealed, jumping up and down in her pink trainers.  
  
"I think we look just fine, thank you very much," Hermia said indignantly.  
  
"Well, too bad for you," Barbie snapped. "Come on, Hermia, try this on." Barbie handed Hermia a pink pleated miniskirt and a pink baby t-shirt, which Hermia looked at with distaste.  
  
"What're we gonna do about Lysander?" Skipper whined.  
  
"It's LySANder," LySANder patiently explained.  
  
"Well, what're we gonna do about LySANder?" Skipper whined.  
  
"Ken, take him to the super-manly blue store," Barbie commanded. Ken and LySANder left to go to the super-manly blue store next door to the cute and trendy pink store.  
  
Hermia changed into the pink pleated miniskirt and pink baby tee. She looked very pink. Barbie and Skipper applauded their clothing choice. Hermia looked at herself in the full-length pink-framed mirror. "I feel really PINK."  
  
"That's exactly the intention," Barbie and Skipper said, smiling evilly. Within minutes they straightened her curly hair. They decided not to bleach it blonde, because someone had to be a brunette, and it wasn't going to be either of them. They put lots of makeup on her, all of it shiny and preppy-pretty. All of this happened in the pink store.  
  
Next door, LySANder put on a pair of blue jeans and a blue button-down shirt. But his socks were still duct-taped to his legs, so he kept wearing those. Ken brought him back to the pink store where Barbie, Skipper, and Hermia were waiting.  
  
"You look very pink," LySANder told Hermia.  
  
"You look very blue," Hermia told LySANder.  
  
"Come, let us leave this place and on the way tell each other of our dreams," LySANder said, escorting Hermia out of the pink store in their new pink-for-girls blue-for-boys clothes. 


	8. Kiss Your Ass!

Chapter Eight- "Kiss Your Ass!"  
  
Since their wedding night, Hippolyta and Theseus had been ruling over a prosperous Athens together. All was well and good, as was to be expected, although Hippolyta still didn't love Theseus. There were no real changes in the kingdom since their wedding.  
  
Except for one. The play that had been performed at their wedding starred one Nick Bottom, a weaver who fancied himself quite an actor. Before the show, he already had one obsessed fan-girl, another member of the play's cast, Robin Starveling the tailor, who had been calling herself his 'groupie' since they met in London over a year ago. But four girls in the audience that night became willing members of his fan club. Those four girls were Renee Johnstown, Carol Warrington, Katia Grant, and Melanie Renton. They had all immediately proclaimed themselves his 'groupies' too. Of course, Robin Starveling didn't like this so much. They just liked him because he was famous. She was there for him, not his celebrity.  
  
Nick Bottom himself didn't particularly care. He was full of himself, and was usually too busy looking in the mirror to notice anything going on around him. Ever since that night that he had a dream that he was an ass and fell in love with Titania, the fairy queen, he had been even more egocentrical, although it's not quite certain why exactly. However, rumors of that night's events had gotten out, and now the best way to get Nick Bottom pissed was to call him an "ass" or an "asshole". And he still had an odd fetish for whipped cream.  
  
Athens noticed the problems with the Nick Bottom groupies more than Nick Bottom himself did. Although there were only five of them, one of whom traveled separately from the other four, they caused quite a stir in town.  
  
Hermia and Lysander used their teleporting powers to return to Athens. Hermia's father Egeus had mysteriously died and they had to attend his funeral. Hermia was very sad, but she really didn't like her dad that much cause he almost made her marry Demetrius. But Hermia was still sad. She had to comfort her mother Kelliy at the funeral. It was a nice funeral, with black flowers for decoration.  
  
The fairies came to Egeus's funeral. They did a sad fairy dance wearing all black at the funeral. Hippolyta and Theseus, being close friends of Egeus, sat in the front row. Theseus made a speech. It was touching. Philostrate was there too. He stood there and was Philostrate.  
  
Nick Bottom also came to Egeus's funeral, although it cannot be said why. Because Nick Bottom came, his groupies Robin, Renee, Carol, Katia, and Melanie came too. They stared raptly and lustfully at him throughout the service. At the end, he got up and made a speech too. At the end of every sentence his groupies clapped madly for him. When he was done making the speech they clapped madly AND screamed things. It was insanity.  
  
"Someone get a hold of those girls!" Kelliy, Hermia's mother, exclaimed. Nobody listened to her, because we made her up.  
  
Theseus was sad that Hippolyta didn't love him. So Puck came with the magical Cupid flower and put its' spell on Hippolyta, so Hippolyta fell in love with Theseus. All was happy.  
  
"Hi, Theseus, hi, Hippolyta," Hermia and Lysander said after the funeral, going up to talk to them.  
  
"Well, hello there, Hermia," said Hippolyta.  
  
"Hello, Lysander," Theseus said, putting emphasis on the 'a' so it sounded like LySANder.  
  
"How are things in Athens?" LySANder asked politely.  
  
"It is all well, except for those five crazy girls!" Theseus said. "Everywhere that Nick Bottom character goes, they follow him. It's insane."  
  
At that moment Nick Bottom walked by admiring himself. Robin was hanging off of his left arm, Carol off of his right, and Renee, Katia, and Melanie were adoringly clustered around him, laughing and talking. Nick Bottom seemed to like the attention.  
  
"I think it's sweet," Hermia proclaimed. "They are in love."  
  
"Alas, judging by all I have ever read or heard of, in fact or fiction, the course of true love never did run smooth. It might be a class difference," said LySANder.  
  
"That is true," said Theseus. Kelliy came up, mourning her husband. Hermia gave her mother a comforting hug. It was a true Kodak moment.  
  
The fairies walked by. They didn't dance, because there are no upbeat songs about funerals. Suddenly, they had an idea. "You've Lost that Lovin' Feeling" started to play. Peaseblossom grabbed Theseus. Mustardseed grabbed Hippolyta. Scooter grabbed Philostrate. Sparkles grabbed Nick Bottom, much to his groupies' chagrin. Cobweb grabbed Robin. Moth grabbed Hermia. Kitty grabbed LySANder. Paisley grabbed Kelliy. Soap grabbed Katia. Rosebud grabbed Melanie. Daffodil grabbed Renee. Bano grabbed Melanie. And Puck, who was there to put the Cupid flower spell on Hippolyta, grabbed Carol. All of the fairies led their mortals in a waltz. It was sad, yet funny. None of the boys, fairy or mortal, knew how to dance, except for LySANder, who had taken hip-hop classes with his sisters Meredith and Shellie when he was in the eighth grade. 


	9. Car Chase!

Chapter Nine: "Car Chase!"  
  
"Ooh, I hate you, stupid Craterface," Danny said angrily to Craterface, his girl Sandy at his side.  
  
"I hate you too," said Craterface. "Why don't we have a big race down at the long road to see who has the fastest car?"  
  
"Fine. Let's race right now," Danny said.  
  
"Fine. Let me go get my girlfriend Cha-Cha so she can stand off to the side and cheer me on in really tight pedal-pushers that I somehow find attractive," Craterface replied.  
  
"Fine."  
  
"Fine."  
  
"Fine."  
  
"Fine."  
  
Craterface drove off in his car. Sandy and Danny stood there. Sandy started talking in her Australian accent.  
  
"Oh, I wish you wouldn't race him, Danny," said Sandy. "You could get hurt!"  
  
"I won't get hurt, Sandy baby," Danny said patronizingly.  
  
"Well, all right," Sandy said, giving in. They got in Danny's flying car and drove to the long road to have a big race.  
  
When they got there, they were met by Hermia and Lysander, who used their teleporting powers to get there. "Danny," Sandy hissed, poking him and pointing at Hermia and Lysander, who were still wearing the pink-for-girls blue-for-boys outfits that Barbie and Ken had given them. "Look! There are two strange people here."  
  
Danny honked his horn at them. "Who are you?"  
  
Lysander bowed grandly. "I am Lysander," he said, with an emphasis on the 'a', so it sounded like LySANder. Hermia curtsied. "And this is my wife, Hermia."  
  
"Well, I'm Danny, and this is my girl Sandy," said Danny. "We're here cause I'm going to have a car race with Craterface."  
  
"Cool," said Hermia. "Can we watch?"  
  
"Sure!" said Sandy. "Come on, we can come stand on this side of the road!" Sandy, Hermia, and LySANder went over to one side of the road. Craterface drove up in his car with Cha-Cha. Craterface started to say something to Danny and honked his horn appropriately cause it was expletive-y and inappropriate. Cha-Cha got out of the car flirtatiously and went to stand on the other side of the road. She took her scarf off and was about to use it as a start-flag for the race, but...  
  
All twelve fairies skipped up. Kitty waved her snowflake-patterned scarf and Danny and Craterface started racing. The fairies stood in the middle of the road, screaming "Go Danny!" or "Go Craterface!" depending on their mood. They drove down to the end of the long road and they tied. Their cars were equally fast.  
  
"Oh my goodness!" exclaimed Hermia. "Why are both of their cars equally fast?"  
  
"Now there is no PLOT!" LySANder said.  
  
"Was there ever?" asked Rosebud. Hermia and LySANder shrugged.  
  
"Now that they have equally fast cars, what in the world are we supposed to do?" Sandy asked, clearly distressed.  
  
Full of ideas, the fairies skipped down to the end of the road where Danny and Craterface were glaring at each other. The fairies made them get out of their cars and stand next to each other nicely. Hermia, LySANder, Sandy, and Cha-Cha scuttled down to the end of the long road.  
  
Danny and Craterface stood next to each other and bowed at their audience. Hermia, LySANder, Sandy, and Cha-Cha all sat on the roof of Craterface's car. Someone started to play "Kung-Fu Fighting".  
  
"Oh my God! They're going to fight!" Hermia shouted.  
  
Craterface pushed Danny. Danny pushed Craterface back. They got in a cat fight. Sandy shielded her pure little eyes from all of the violence. Cha- Cha shielded her eyes cause she didn't want to see them act like teenage girls.  
  
Then Craterface and Danny started running at each other and falling over. The fairies were watching all of this from frozen karate poses. Craterface and Danny fought with each other for a long time. Then they knocked each other over. At that moment in time, Kitty and Sparkles walked by with signs that read "ROUND 2" in dripping red letters. Then Cobweb, Mustardseed, Moth, Kitty, Rosebud, and Paisley ran over and picked up Danny and sat him on a rock that just so happened to be there, and Peaseblossom, Sparkles, Soap, Scooter, Daffodil, and Bano ran over and picked up Craterface and sat him on the other rock that just so happened to be there.  
  
An upbeat fight-like song started to play. Danny's fairies made him all ready for the next round and Craterface's fairies made him all ready for the next round. Everyone was being made ready for the next round. It was fun. Sandy was going, "Oh my goodness!" Hermia and LySANder were watching in antici...pation.  
  
Cha-Cha got off of her seat on the car and brought out a suitcase. She drew two swords from it. LySANder and Hermia shook their heads no. Cha- Cha then drew two green lightsabers (plastic of course) from the suitcase. LySANder and Hermia madly shook their heads yes. Sandy looked at Cha-Cha with anxiety. Cha-Cha rolled her eyes. What harm could they do to each other with plastic green lightsabers?  
  
Danny and Craterface started to fight with the lightsabers. Hermia and LySANder laughed because LySANder had fought Demetrius with green plastic lightsabers once. In fact, Demetrius and LySANder had had a fight sequence almost exactly like this once... hmm. Déjà vu. Hermia and LySANder looked at each other because of the déjà vu. Then in unison, they shrugged and returned to watching Danny and Craterface fight.  
  
"GO DANNY!" shouted Sandy. Hermia and LySANder just shouted random things.  
  
"GO CRATERFACE!" shouted Cha-Cha.  
  
Danny and Craterface finished their fight with Danny knocking Craterface's lightsaber out of his hand. Danny held his lightsaber in the air triumphantly.  
  
"Danny is the winner!" announced Mustardseed. Hermia and LySANder clapped. Sandy ran over and hugged Danny. It was cute. 


	10. Skip To My Lou!

Chapter Ten- "Skip to my Lou!"  
  
"Hey, Tenderheart Bear, come on!" shouted Wish Bear. "Let's go play hopscotch with Friend Bear, Cheer Bear, Funshine Bear, Share Bear, Grumpy Bear, Bedtime Bear, Grams, Hugs, Tugs, Birthday Bear, Good Luck Bear, Secret Bear, Love-a-Lot Bear, and Laugh-a-Lot Bear!" The turquoise bear waved at the brown bear, and together they skipped to where the peach bear, the pink bear, the yellow bear, the purple bear, the blue bear, the other blue bear, the grey bear, the small pink bear, the small blue bear, the orange bear, the green bear, the other yellow bear, the other pink bear, and the other orange bear were waiting, the peach bear etching out a hopscotch court on the cloud they were all standing on.  
  
For they were the Care Bears, the happiest creatures in the world, and they lived in Care-a-Lot, a city in the clouds populated with Care Bears, the bears who care. Care Bears went all over the world cheering people up. That was their job.  
  
"I'll go first!" cried Hugs Bear, the littlest pink bear in all of Care-a- Lot. She picked up a stone as heavy as a feather and threw it on the hopscotch court, skipping on the court to grab it.  
  
Hermia and Lysander teleported to Care-a-Lot and conveniently landed on the exact cloud the Care Bears were playing hopscotch on.  
  
"Oh my goodness, who are you?" asked Good Luck Bear.  
  
Lysander bowed grandly. "I am Lysander," he said, with an emphasis on the 'a', so it sounded like LySANder. Hermia curtsied. "And this is my wife, Hermia."  
  
"Wow! That's cool! Are you in love?" asked Love-a-Lot Bear.  
  
"Yes, we are very much in love. Would you like to hear the story of how we got engaged?" asked Hermia.  
  
"No thank you," said Tugs.  
  
"Would you like some chocolate? I'll share," said Share Bear.  
  
"Sure, I would love some chocolate," said Hermia. She took some of the purple bear's chocolate.  
  
"Is it your birthday?" asked Birthday Bear.  
  
"Nope, it is not my birthday," said LySANder.  
  
"I am grumpy," announced Grumpy Bear.  
  
"Cheer up!" said Cheer Bear.  
  
"Look at all of the sunshine!" said Funshine Bear.  
  
"And the friends!" added Friend Bear.  
  
"And all the laughter!" Laugh-a-Lot Bear commented.  
  
"And the sleepy clouds!" put in Bedtime Bear, falling asleep rather comfortably.  
  
"Wow, it is so happy here!" Hermia and LySANder exclaimed.  
  
"Come on, let's play hopscotch!" said Secret Bear.  
  
So Hermia and LySANder played hopscotch with the Care Bears. 


End file.
